Let’s be real—the honeymoon phase isn’t all rose petals and breakfast in bed. Once the wedding confetti settles, real life kicks in, and even the most blissed-out couples can stumble into the same traps. From communication slip-ups to financial faux pas, the most common newlywed mistakes have a sneaky way of showing up uninvited. But here’s the good news: with a little foresight and a dash of humor, you can sidestep these pitfalls and keep the newlywed glow going strong.
#1. No Clear Financial Plan
Newly married couples are mostly young (20-30 years old) so their financial capacity is still minimal. When you first fall in love, money is not really a big problem, but once you get married, the two of you need a lot of expenses to ensure your life. Many couples have unnecessary conflicts about money, which can significantly affect family happiness.
Therefore, when starting married life, the couple should discuss and develop a clear and reasonable income and spending plan for themselves and their family. In addition to your monthly fixed expenses, you should also have a backup fund for emergencies like you suddenly losing your job, or having an unexpected accident.
#2. Jumping In Too Fast
We have all seen and heard the stories of couples meeting and getting married within a few weeks. Huh? This has always baffled our minds. I mean, how can anyone possibly think that they “know someone” after only a few weeks?
After being in the wedding industry for over 17 years, we are here to tell you…divorce is real and it is happening at alarming rates today. Of course, there are many reasons for divorce in modern times, and it is not always because you got married too fast. Truth is, several things on this list are the reasons why couples are getting divorced at unheard-of rates.
If we could provide only one tip to new couples, it would be don’t rush into it! Take your time and really get to know each other. There is a hidden rule in relationships that states, people in relationships don’t really begin to let their real person show until after two years. And speaking from experience, my husband didn’t even fart in front of me until after about 3 years of dating. I don’t know when and where he farted before that, but as soon as we built and moved into our house, all of a sudden, he then felt comfortable to let it loose whenever and wherever he wanted.
You see, at the beginning of a relationship, you are “conscious” of what you are doing. You don’t let those bad habits loose until later once you have already sealed the deal. What does this mean and why is it important?
Not jumping into marriage too early can save you from an early divorce because it allows you to TRULY get to know your boo. Take it from us, if you have pet peeves like you hate when your spouse leaves their dirty clothes on the floor after work. Or they never close kitchen cabinets, toilet seat up, dirty car, they snore or they leave toothpaste in the bathroom sink every day then you better believe you need to take your time.
Crappy habits don’t show themselves until the deal is sealed and a commitment has been made. So, take our advice. Slow down and really get to know each other before you get engaged and say “I Do!” You will thank us later.
Tips To Avoiding The Top 9 Newlywed Mistakes
#3. Not Discussing Everything Before Making Decisions
Before tying the knot, you are an independent person and you make all decisions related to your life quickly and neatly. But now you are husband and wife, so every decision, whether related to yourself or your family, influences your partner. Not sharing with your wife/husband before making a decision will make the other feel disrespectful and really hurt.
This is the reason why you should speak to your spouse before making big decisions. This will increase the trustworthiness and respect of the partner with you.
#4. Disappointed When You Realize That You Do Not Really Understand The Partner’s Personality
As you know, when we love each other, we will always try to make a lot of good impressions on the other. But when you get married, you will realize that many things in your spouse are not the same as before. He is irritable but not gentle, he is not neat and tidy are an example. This can make you feel frustrated, disappointed, and sometimes lose confidence in your marriage.
To avoid falling into this situation, you should share with your partner more about your expectations. In addition, you should also practice thinking in a simpler and more comfortable way to easily adapt to this married life.
#5. Keep Secrets Private
In fact, each of us has our own secrets. But marriage is built on trust and sincerity, so we should not keep too many secrets from the other. Of course, there are things that you cannot share and just keep them to yourself, but once shared, please be honest. Especially, you should not hide important things related to money, family, or career.
#6. Not Respecting Each Other’s Interests Or Hobbies
This is a common disagreement among newlyweds. Once married, you will tend to express your ego more clearly. This is essential for the other party to understand, adapt, and respect your interests. However, it is not easy for you to accept other’s interests if they are contrary to their interests.
The advice for you is to adapt and respect each person’s own preferences so that he/she can make his/her partner feel comfortable with you.
#7. No Romantic Actions
When you get married and have comparisons with the past, you realize that your partner is no longer romantic. No more flowers and lovely gifts on special occasions or no more intimate gestures.
Remember romantic things are necessary for love and especially in marriage. Just spend time for a date, watch a movie, go on a picnic-like lovers, then your love will spring up one more time.
#8. Disagreement About Kids
Having a baby is a significant important in marital life. But for a myriad of reasons, many couples have a conflict on this matter. One person wants to have a baby right after marriage, but the other does not want to have yet because of the housing and economic conditions.
One tip is that both need to sit down and agree on a plan to have children in the future. Just give birth when both are mentally and materially ready because raising a child is not easy.
#9. Getting Married For The Wrong Reasons
Please do not get married just to have a “wedding”. We get it! You have always dreamt of a fairytale wedding, you want it to happen sooner rather than later. But many times, getting married just to “have a wedding” and wear a wedding dress typically ends very quickly. At our bridal boutique, we saw repeat brides coming into the store within only a few years….marrying someone else. This is one of the most common newlywed mistakes.
Ladies, a wedding is not a marriage it is just a party (and a very expensive one). Marriage is a joining of two souls into one. So, if you aren’t ready to give up your selfish ways and abandon the “it’s all about me” mentality, then you may not be ready for marriage; therefore, don’t waste money on a wedding. If you do, you will only find yourself also spending a lot of money on a divorce.
While wedding planning, you may also want to look out for these common wedding myths.
